Generic Lurker Lounge thread
#1
Large block of text describing a humorous event.

Image relating to the humorous event.

Appeal for stories from others who may have experienced a similar generic event.

p.s. sidenote
Reply
#2
Generic reply:

1) You spelled X (where X is a word in the original post) wrong. Idiot!
2) Well, technically, Y (being the anecdote supplied) only applies when condition Z is met. Therefore, your story is irrelevant. The picture is cute, though.
3) According to F (where F is an ancient philosopher/scientist/historical figure), this event is caused by thing H (where H is something that sounds really intelligent). I agree with F and I think you should too.
4) Everyone who thinks differently than me is a blathering troll and should be banned. Why do the mods never do anything about poster M (where M is the poster who disagrees with me the most)? Geez!
5) Anyone who posts more than me has no life.
6) Anyone who posts less than me is inferior, hasn't been here long enough, or is a young punk whippersnapper.

-Poster name
Poster Signature

P.S. Insert disclaimer here to cover myself in case anything I said above is grossly wrong and I get called on it.



------------------

P.P.S. Yes, I'm having fun here, despite the post's tone. Wait - isn't that a disclaimer? :w00t:

-Bolty
Quote:Considering the mods here are generally liberals who seem to have a soft spot for fascism and white supremacy (despite them saying otherwise), me being perma-banned at some point is probably not out of the question.
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#3
Bolty,Dec 28 2004, 03:02 AM Wrote:Generic reply:
P.S.  Insert disclaimer here to cover myself in case anything I said above is grossly wrong and I get called on it.
[right][snapback]63697[/snapback][/right]

Emoticon :rolleyes: reply showing my disdain towards your reply.

Witty sarcastic remark.
Reply
#4
You forgot the other type of thread. "The Link."

It has a title. And it has a hyperlink to some article. Nothing more. Nothing less.

And does the person who plopped this pre-proccessed thought onto our plate have anything to say on the subject? Does he have an opinion about it? Well, we'll never know, because our dear little herald deigns it unneccessary for you to know what he's all about on this article.

You go ahead and make the first move. Respond to his thread which he chooses not to say anything of his own. You see, without having laid his own hand down on the table first, he controls the hole card in the next play.

My take on it is: if he can't be bothered to chip in his two cents on the subject he made the effort to bring up, then he shouldn't waste my time telling me to read something he doesn't have the conviction to take a stance upon from the get-go.

As a writer, I know the importance of hooking the reader. Do you know how supremely unengaging a simple hyperlink can be?
Political Correctness is the idea that you can foster tolerance in a diverse world through the intolerance of anything that strays from a clinical standard.
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#5
So it is old and used, but I still like it. It exists in many variants and I think it was initially written for usenet or possibly some mail list (haven't been able to find who initiall wrote it up). I made some smaller changes to suite a forum.


How many Lurkers does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post to the forums that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the forum that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to write to the forum administrator about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this forum

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this exchange to the Off Topic forum

203 to demand that cross posting to the Grammar, Spelling and Illuminati forums about changing light bulbs be stopped

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb forum about changing light bulbs be stopped

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and to post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this forum

33 to link all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and signatures and then add "Me too"

12 to post to the forum that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

4 to suggest that posters read the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago in the WoW forum?"

67 to ask "what's WoW?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

5 to propose a new "change lite bulb" forum

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again
There are three types of people in the world. Those who can count and those who can't.
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#6
DeeBye,Dec 28 2004, 02:08 AM Wrote:Emoticon :rolleyes: reply showing my disdain towards your reply.

Witty sarcastic remark.

Misguided attempt by uninvolved party to prevent conflict while ignoring content of original post, suggestion to maintain focus on original post and avoid personal degradation.

Suggestion to read forum FAQ/etiquette for guidance on how to behave in a civil manner.

Bland closing statement that all opinions should be received with an open mind and each person is entitled to believe as s/he sees fit.
ah bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bob
dyah ah dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dth
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Reply
#7
A few Lurkers to ask when the thread will be locked,
while secretly hoping that the thread won't be locked until Pete, Occhidiangela, and Doc give a few of the replies, and perhaps the original post, a good thrashing.

And a few more Lurkers with posts dangerously close to getting formal warnings for inappropriate use of smilies.
<_< :( :blush: :lol: :o :w00t: :wacko: ;) B) :whistling:

Finally, we all recognize the downward spiral of the thread when a forum member is compared to an infamous historical figure.
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
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#8
Something about Iraq war/middle East/U.S.

Some posters telling non U.S. people to stay out of U.S. business.
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
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#9
DeeBye,Dec 28 2004, 12:51 AM Wrote:Large block of text describing a humorous event.

Image relating to the humorous event.

Appeal for stories from others who may have experienced a similar generic event.

p.s. sidenote
[right][snapback]63696[/snapback][/right]

Standard rogue reply, or series of replies. For each reply, choose one from group A and two from Group B

Group A

-Rambling and facetious comments related to posted topic
-Bridge/transition to different topic using initial subject as springboard
-Comment that Eurotrash needs to be aware that anti American posts will elicit caustic reply, regardless of original post's direction
-Snide remark about something related, sorta, to the topic
-Rant induced by an overdose, again, of caffeine
-Discussion on the Illuminati (thanks Jarulf :lol: ) and how they fit historically into the military or religious history of the topic addressed in the fifth reply, in counterpoint to the 19th and 27th replies
-A reminder that Bolty, our congenial host, and Gris, our traffic cop with a heart of gold, do their thing for free -- please stop whinging about "freedom of speech" on the Lounge.

Group B

Poem
Joke
Lead Balloon
Quotation of some dead person
Two edits, due to not using the Preview button
An appeal to drink a Guinness
Inside joke aimed at a GOL
"Where ya sit determines what you see"
"Fun is where you find it"

Usual sig

EDIT: Due to the usual bonehead move, I ended up with two edits, just as I listed. Unintentional humor is the best kind. :blush:
Cry 'Havoc' and let slip the Men 'O War!
In War, the outcome is never final. --Carl von Clausewitz--
Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum
John 11:35 - consider why.
In Memory of Pete
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#10
Somebody mentioned me? And implied that I may reply to a thread in less than positive fashion?!

BEGIN BURNINATING NOW!! WHO DARES SUMMON ME AND DISTURB MY PEACEFUL SLUMBER?! I WILL BURNINATE YOUR THATCHED ROOF COTTAGES!

Allow me to make gratitious mention of 3l33t verbage, Star Craft zerg rush pwnage, and all your base are belong to us!!

All your thr34d are belong to me. You have no chance to survive, make your time, hahaha! For gr34t justice, take off every zerg. Go zerg go zerg!
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.

"Isn't this where...."
Reply
#11
Witty Riposte.

Bad day at work while post remains half-completed on screen for 3 hours. Return to post in entirely different mindset.

Angry Personal Sidenote. Following web chaos theory protocol, Nazis are brought into the picture, and members are compared to same, leading directly into a heated discussion of Christianity via discussion of Tibetan Nazi relic runs and the Spear of Destiny.

Confusion. Laughter and outrage. Explained misunderstanding, which leads to mutual grudging respect, culminating in Humorous Personal Anecdote.

Extended String of Anecdotes increasing camaraderie, while having nothing whatsoever to do with the thread topic.

Snooty review of New Poster's On-Topic Comment. The on-topic posting had nothing to do with the personal anecdotes that were off-topic, and so the on-topic post, paradoxically, is regarded as off-topic.

Ruminate. Experience Growing Boredom due to peaceful discussion; return to discussion of Nazis, resemblance of various posters to prior, adding alien abductions into the mix to keep things interesting.

New poster attempts to join in the fun with Witty Comment Directly Related to Nazis and Aliens.

Berate new poster for not staying on the original topic.

New posters leave in disgust. Remaining members lament lack of new blood and thread participation.

Blame situation on too many Nazis being abducted by aliens.

Comments ensue.
:P
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#12
Doc,Dec 28 2004, 12:00 PM Wrote:Somebody mentioned me? And implied that I may reply to a thread in less than positive fashion?!

BEGIN BURNINATING NOW!! WHO DARES SUMMON ME AND DISTURB MY PEACEFUL SLUMBER?! I WILL BURNINATE YOUR THATCHED ROOF COTTAGES!

Allow me to make gratitious mention of 3l33t verbage, Star Craft zerg rush pwnage, and all your base are belong to us!!

All your thr34d are belong to me. You have no chance to survive, make your time, hahaha! For gr34t justice, take off every zerg. Go zerg go zerg!
[right][snapback]63730[/snapback][/right]

Silly comment that does nothing but waste thread space and has something to do with topic.

Side note: Why is it that in the past few days I've been always typoing "ing" as "ign", and having to switch it back?
I may be dead, but I'm not old (source: see lavcat)

The gloves come off, I'm playing hardball. It's fourth and 15 and you're looking at a full-court press. (Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun)

Some people in forums do the next best thing to listening to themselves talk, writing and reading what they write (source, my brother)
Reply
#13
Quote:Blah blah blah blah blah... (Taken out of context)

Man, this is just an example of why new posters are reluctant to post at the Lounge. This post reeks of total elitism and shows that Lurkers are suffering from (Insert psychoanalytical term) here.




It's pretty obvious that people have diffrent thoughts and styles. If said poster constantly makes (insert mechinical error) here he will be flamed however if a [insert controversial long term poster here] does he or she will be lauded.

People have opinions. It is true that we at the Lounge do not support (insert ludicrous immature behavior) nor do we condone (some way to butcher the English Language) Perhaps this person really is a (racist, spammer, idiot, troll) from daring to suggest that X is indeed not why.

To the original poster, I hope that you will not be offended when I tell you it is the general policy of the lounge that We definitely do not condone Q. I understand that A often leads to B and C leads to Y, but there are indeed other sites that do agree with your way of doing V.

On the other hand, as long as people do not post links to (insert evil tool here), discussion about it, while can lead to confrontations. I believe that indeed that everyone should take a break and calm down because there are greater things in life than Q.

You see I've been lurking around the Lounge since 1879 and I must admit the elitism has toned down, I have left this site for decades because of these elitist attitudes. How many more potential (insert personality type) will we shun because of our atittude?
Very soon the Lounge (will fall apart, die, get injured, disappear, degenerate into insanity, get bought by Microsoft) if we keep our ways.

However, this is a valuable resource.
Http://www.google.com
(Insert link to CNN)

But in the end we are supposed to have fun here, right? (Insert non-menacing smiley)
With great power comes the great need to blame other people.
Guild Wars 2: (ArchonWing.9480) 
Battle.net (ArchonWing.1480)
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#14
Minionman,Dec 28 2004, 03:34 PM Wrote:Silly comment that does nothing but waste thread space and has something to do with topic.

Side note: Why is it that in the past few days I've been always typoing "ing" as "ign", and having to switch it back?
[right][snapback]63753[/snapback][/right]

LOL. :D (Insert stupid joke based on wordplay with the above post no more than one sentence long)

:) :D :P :blink: :blush: :angry: :ph34r:
With great power comes the great need to blame other people.
Guild Wars 2: (ArchonWing.9480) 
Battle.net (ArchonWing.1480)
Reply
#15
Post arguing for an argument that got shot down repeatedly by many Lurkers using the same structure and original basis as the first post while being reworded to sound like a new argument. Also, this post is directed at the Lurker who shot down the previous argument, not the reasons given to make the argument invalid.


edit added later: a roundabout appology asking the Lurker being argued with to not take it personally and another appology asking Lurkers to not take this post in an argumentative context. smilie added to lighten the mood: :)
The Bill of No Rights
The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance. Robert A. Heinlein
Reply
#16
DeeBye,Dec 28 2004, 02:51 AM Wrote:Large block of text describing a humorous event.

Image relating to the humorous event.

Appeal for stories from others who may have experienced a similar generic event.

p.s. sidenote
[right][snapback]63696[/snapback][/right]

Generic request to admins to make a grace period in which after a new person registers they cannot post for a few days.
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#17
Rhydderch Hael,Dec 28 2004, 03:45 AM Wrote:You go ahead and make the first move. Respond to his thread which he chooses not to say anything of his own. You see, without having laid his own hand down on the table first, he controls the hole card in the next play.
[right][snapback]63700[/snapback][/right]

Click random post and click reply button. Agree whole-heartedly.
WWBBD?
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#18
Yrrek,Dec 28 2004, 11:52 PM Wrote:Click random post and click reply button. Agree whole-heartedly.
[right][snapback]63777[/snapback][/right]

Apparent non-sequitor remark.

Edit after realisation of posting in the wrong thread. Display of embarassment, followed by a plea for forgiveness.
Reply
#19
Insert Lounge cliche. Beep Beep Little Satilite. Somebody posts retina burning picture of TEH LOBSTO.

Whacky images by Deebye and others to follow.

Proposition of new Lounge cliche.

[Image: dynamitemonkey.jpg]

Heated debate over explosive packing monkey ensues.

Ghostiger does not disapoint, taunts dynamite monkey, igniting a whole lot more than a flame war.
All alone, or in twos,
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down outside the wall.
Some hand in hand
And some gathered together in bands.
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand.

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall, after all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad buggers wall.

"Isn't this where...."
Reply
#20
:lol: I'm dying here :lol: I don't even know which side of the topic to support , or who to crack a joke at ! :lol:
Stormrage :
SugarSmacks / 90 Shammy -Elemental
TaMeKaboom/ 90 Hunter - BM
TaMeOsis / 90 Paladin - Prot
TaMeAgeddon/ 85 Warlock - Demon
TaMeDazzles / 85 Mage- Frost
FrostDFlakes / 90 Rogue
TaMeOlta / 85 Druid-resto
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