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The Corrupted Wish Game - Zafarium - 05-06-2005

pazuzu,May 6 2005, 07:33 AM Wrote:Granted. You realized it sooner. However you have yet to realize what is the final exam...
I wish I could type faster with just my left hand, because this is taking forever!
[right][snapback]76451[/snapback][/right]

Granted. You now can type faster with just your left hand. Unfortunately it is only one WPM faster and you now lose the use of your right hand as concentrating on improving your left hand, makes you ignore your right hand, making it shrivel up and die.

I wish this thread was stickied.

EDIT: Stupid typos. I wish typos didn't exist!

Was doesn't equal wish.


The Corrupted Wish Game - jahcs - 05-06-2005

Zafarium,May 6 2005, 09:34 AM Wrote:Granted.  You now can type faster with just your left hand.  Unfortunately it is only one WPM faster and you now lose the use of your right hand as concentrating on improving your left hand, makes you ignore your right hand, making it shrivel up and die.

I was this thread was stickied.
[right][snapback]76471[/snapback][/right]

Your wish has been corrupted by a typo so I will grant the wish exactly as written:

Sometime in recent history you were turned into a piece of thread and placed in a vat of sticky goo.

I wish my customers were friendly and smart.


The Corrupted Wish Game - TaiDaishar - 05-06-2005

jahcs,May 6 2005, 07:58 PM Wrote:Your wish has been corrupted by a typo so I will grant the wish exactly as written:

Sometime in recent history you were turned into a piece of thread and placed in a vat of sticky goo.

I wish my customers were friendly and smart.
[right][snapback]76474[/snapback][/right]

Poof! Now all your customers WERE friendly and smart and because this contradicts with the Basic Rules of the Universe™ the universe implodes instantly and an alternate universe is created in which all customers are even more horrid and as a bonus, your employer despises you so much that when he sees you foam is coming out of his mouth.


I wish I would never have to shave ever again (oh this is just TOO easy).


The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 05-06-2005

TaiDaishar,May 6 2005, 02:16 PM Wrote:Poof! Now all your customers WERE friendly and smart and because this contradicts with the Basic Rules of the Universe™ the universe implodes instantly and an alternate universe is created in which all customers are even more horrid and as a bonus, your employer despises you so much that when he sees you foam is coming out of his mouth.
I wish I would never have to shave ever again (oh this is just TOO easy).
[right][snapback]76480[/snapback][/right]

Granted. You're now preadolescent and will continue to un-age until you reach the point of conception, at which point you disappear and will have never existed.

I wish I had one full tin of every kind of sour Altoids. Little 1.76-ounce tins like they sell them in.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-06-2005

Lady Vashj,May 6 2005, 12:21 PM Wrote:Granted.  You're now preadolescent and will continue to un-age until you reach the point of conception, at which point you disappear and will have never existed.

I wish I had one full tin of every kind of sour Altoids.  Little 1.76-ounce tins like they sell them in.
[right][snapback]76481[/snapback][/right]

Granted. You buy it as a specialty item that costs so much that ou would have saved money by buying severlaboxes of regular 1 altoid mixtures.

I wish I was president without having to campaign.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 05-06-2005

Minionman,May 6 2005, 01:19 PM Wrote:Granted.  You buy it as a specialty item that costs so much that ou would have saved money by buying severlaboxes of regular 1 altoid mixtures.

I wish I was president without having to campaign.
[right][snapback]76485[/snapback][/right]

You are president, and you just learned that 17 different groups are plotting your assassination: tomorrow.

I wish my Senator would answer my letters to her.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Swiss Mercenary - 05-06-2005

Occhidiangela,May 6 2005, 08:49 PM Wrote:I wish my Senator would answer my letters to her.
[right][snapback]76499[/snapback][/right]

Granted. Every night, hooligans steal your mailbox, so you never get to read the said letters.

I wish that I never saw this thread!


The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-06-2005

Swiss Mercenary,May 6 2005, 03:59 PM Wrote:Granted. Every night, hooligans steal your mailbox, so you never get to read the said letters.

I wish that I never saw this thread!
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Granted. Now everyone gets mad at you for letting someone else use your forum name to post in the thread. Since you honestly didn't see the posts, you must not have written them, right?

I wish I was a summoner necro.


The Corrupted Wish Game - TaiDaishar - 05-07-2005

Minionman,May 7 2005, 01:37 AM Wrote:I wish I was a summoner necro.
[right][snapback]76517[/snapback][/right]

Granted, you are now a summoner necromancer, although not a very good one, in fact, you downright suck, while trying to raise a mere Clay Golem you somehow managed to create a clone of Rossane Bar which will make your life a living hell with idiotic jokes from her thankfully DEAD sitcom.

I wish I didn't feel so... yucky right now.



The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-07-2005

TaiDaishar,May 6 2005, 06:39 PM Wrote:Granted, you are now a summoner necromancer, although not a very good one, in fact, you downright suck, while trying to raise a mere Clay Golem you somehow managed to create a clone of Rossane Bar which will make your life a living hell with idiotic jokes from her thankfully DEAD sitcom.

I wish I didn't feel so... yucky right now.
[right][snapback]76520[/snapback][/right]

Granted. You now feel burnt out, which is a vry different feeling.

I wish for 20 more wishes.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 05-07-2005

Minionman,May 6 2005, 08:46 PM Wrote:Granted. You now feel burnt out, which is a vry different feeling.

I wish for 20 more wishes.
[right][snapback]76523[/snapback][/right]

Granted, but the British Labour party just taxed you for 19 of them, and donated them to the Make a Wish Foundation in a PR blitz to win American support for the Blair government.

I wish I understood Ukranian politics.



The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-07-2005

Occhidiangela,May 6 2005, 09:30 PM Wrote:Granted, but the British Labour party just taxed you for 19 of them, and donated them to the Make a Wish Foundation in a PR blitz to win American support for the Blair government.

I wish I understood Ukranian politics.
[right][snapback]76525[/snapback][/right]

You understand Ukranian politics. Than Ukraine changes its name to Penslon, and you're in the dark again.


I wish broccoli tasted good.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Doc - 05-08-2005

Minionman,May 7 2005, 06:25 PM Wrote:I wish broccoli tasted good.
[right][snapback]76587[/snapback][/right]


Granted!

But you find out it only tastes good when grown inside a cow's colon.

I wish... I wish I could hurry up and find out if I will be one of the testers for one of the new prototypes coming out of Smith & Wesson. All this waiting is farking driving me nuts. I keep hearing rumors, I have chewed my fingernails down to nubs.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 05-08-2005

Doc,May 7 2005, 08:00 PM Wrote:I wish... I wish I could hurry up and find out if I will be one of the testers for one of the new prototypes coming out of Smith & Wesson. All this waiting is farking driving me nuts. I keep hearing rumors, I have chewed my fingernails down to nubs.
[right][snapback]76597[/snapback][/right]

Granted, you find out you are not one of the testers due to a disqualification, since one of the criterion is fingernails grown well past nub length.

I wish my garden would be self weeding.

Occhi



The Corrupted Wish Game - TaiDaishar - 05-08-2005

Occhidiangela,May 8 2005, 04:50 PM Wrote:Granted, you find out you are not one of the testers due to a disqualification, since one of the criterion is fingernails grown well past nub length.

I wish my garden would be self weeding.

Occhi
[right][snapback]76626[/snapback][/right]

Granted, your garden is now self weeding, it is now also independent and declares itself to be a country of it's own, tresspassers would be strangled by tomatoes.

I wish I'll have fun in the army which I'm being conscripted to within 2 months



The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 05-08-2005

TaiDaishar,May 8 2005, 09:04 AM Wrote:I wish I'll have fun in the army which I'm being conscripted to within 2 months
[right][snapback]76627[/snapback][/right]

Granted, you will have fun, and you'll also have the pee scared out of you more than once.

I wish pizza could be teleported to our house, fresh from the oven, when we phone in an order.

Occhi



The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-08-2005

Occhidiangela,May 8 2005, 09:50 AM Wrote:Granted, you will have fun, and you'll also have the pee scared out of you more than once.

I wish pizza could be teleported to our house, fresh from the oven, when we phone in an order.

Occhi
[right][snapback]76629[/snapback][/right]

Granted, and it now costs $1,345.99, since those teleporter machines are expensive.

I wish I didn't have to go to any graduation ceremonies, and could just grab a dimploma and walk out.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 05-08-2005

Minionman,May 8 2005, 10:22 AM Wrote:Granted, and it now costs $1,345.99, since those teleporter machines are expensive.

I wish I didn't have to go to any graduation ceremonies, and could just grab a dimploma and walk out.
[right][snapback]76631[/snapback][/right]


Granted. Unfortunately, you grabbed the wrong diploma and there is now a warrant out for you arrest, midemeanor theft.

I wish resoling shoes was more commonly done.



The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 05-08-2005

Occhidiangela,May 8 2005, 11:24 AM Wrote:Granted.  Unfortunately, you grabbed the wrong diploma and there is now a warrant out for you arrest, midemeanor theft.

I wish resoling shoes was more commonly done.
[right][snapback]76633[/snapback][/right]

Granted. Because other parts of shoair are less common, the top parts of your shoes fall apart faster, and you start wishing for more of those.

I wish I could use chopsticks.


The Corrupted Wish Game - Brother Laz - 05-08-2005

Pity you didn't specify what you wanted to use them for. Seems like the cops are now after you...

I wish my mod had 5000 downloads in one day. :D