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+--- Thread: The Corrupted Wish Game (/thread-6501.html)
The Corrupted Wish Game - Gurnsey - 06-10-2005
Minionman,Jun 10 2005, 09:21 AM Wrote:I wish could handle heat better without handling cold or medium temperatures worse.Granted! Here are some oven-mitts. They allow you to handle hot, medium or cold things with ease. They also have cute kittens on them! Awwwwww.
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I wish I hadn't just drank 2 cups of tea, a cup of coffee and a Dr. Pepper without eating anything this morning. *jitters*
The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 06-11-2005
Gurnsey,Jun 10 2005, 11:41 AM Wrote:Granted! Here are some oven-mitts. They allow you to handle hot, medium or cold things with ease. They also have cute kittens on them! Awwwwww.
I wish I hadn't just drank 2 cups of tea, a cup of coffee and a Dr. Pepper without eating anything this morning. *jitters*
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Granted. You now understand how my mind works.
I wish my sunburn would turn to tan.
Occhi
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-11-2005
Occhidiangela,Jun 10 2005, 06:15 PM Wrote:Granted. You now understand how my mind works.
I wish my sunburn would turn to tan.
Occhi
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Granted. The tan also hides the melanoma that you get as well, and would have noticed without a tan.
I wish it wasn't so hot in summer
The Corrupted Wish Game - gekko - 06-11-2005
Minionman,Jun 10 2005, 08:43 PM Wrote:Granted. The tan also hides the melanoma that you get as well, and would have noticed without a tan.
I wish it wasn't so hot in summer
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Granted! The temperature drops an average of 10 degrees during the summer. Unfortunately, the humidity rises drastically, and remains at record levels every single second of every single day. You learn the truth behind the saying: "it's not the heat, it's the humidiy."
I wish Steve Jobs would make his next big announcement wearing something - anything - besides a black turtleneck and blue jeans.
gekko
The Corrupted Wish Game - Occhidiangela - 06-11-2005
gekko,Jun 10 2005, 09:02 PM Wrote:Granted! The temperature drops an average of 10 degrees during the summer. Unfortunately, the humidity rises drastically, and remains at record levels every single second of every single day. You learn the truth behind the saying: "it's not the heat, it's the humidiy."
I wish Steve Jobs would make his next big announcement wearing something - anything - besides a black turtleneck and blue jeans.
gekko
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Granted. Steve Jobs makes his next announcement wearing a rhinestone encrusted thong, and flip flops. Paris Hilton is not mentioned in tabloids for three days in the ensuing firestorm.
I wish Paris Hilton would do something other than play attention trollop.
Occhi
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-11-2005
Occhidiangela,Jun 10 2005, 09:17 PM Wrote:Granted. Steve Jobs makes his next announcement wearing a rhinestone encrusted thong, and flip flops. Paris Hilton is not mentioned in tabloids for three days in the ensuing firestorm.
I wish Paris Hilton would do something other than play attention trollop.
Occhi
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Granted. She now plays basketball. Unfortunately, it's not near your house, so you don't get the joy and laughter of watching her try to play.
I wish Peter was a more common name.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 06-13-2005
Granted. EVERYBODY'S (or at least every man's) name is now Peter, and boys are required to change their names as soon as they receive their high school diploma or GED. Whenever you yell "Hi, Peter!" (or any likely nickname derived therefrom), every man in hearing distance is going to think you're talking to him. Teenage boys who want to stay Mark or Robert or Joe for the rest of their lives will drop out of high school and never even try to get GEDs. Unemployment and adult illiteracy rise dramatically, and women take over in all areas of life because they're the only ones who stick it out for their entire education (because they can keep the name they were born with). Eventually, men give up on first names altogether and go by their last names exclusively. The use of first names dies out in America.
I wish I knew for damn skippy what my housing arrangements are. I know that FSU got my housing contract and deposit, but I have no idea what they're doing about it.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-13-2005
Lady Vashj,Jun 13 2005, 06:01 AM Wrote:Granted. EVERYBODY'S (or at least every man's) name is now Peter, and boys are required to change their names as soon as they receive their high school diploma or GED. Whenever you yell "Hi, Peter!" (or any likely nickname derived therefrom), every man in hearing distance is going to think you're talking to him. Teenage boys who want to stay Mark or Robert or Joe for the rest of their lives will drop out of high school and never even try to get GEDs. Unemployment and adult illiteracy rise dramatically, and women take over in all areas of life because they're the only ones who stick it out for their entire education (because they can keep the name they were born with). Eventually, men give up on first names altogether and go by their last names exclusively. The use of first names dies out in America.
I wish I knew for damn skippy what my housing arrangements are. I know that FSU got my housing contract and deposit, but I have no idea what they're doing about it.
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Granted. You will be living in a box outside one of the engineering buildings.
(I'm also having some housing issues, Don't feel like explaining them here, but they are worrying.)
I wish these forms were easier to figure out.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 06-13-2005
Minionman,Jun 13 2005, 10:00 AM Wrote:Granted. You will be living in a box outside one of the engineering buildings. Granted. The forms in question are asking you to sign away your God-given freedom in exchange for a rusty Plymouth Reliant. It's my dad's old car, so it's really had the crap beaten out of it over its lifetime. Refusal to sign these forms will result in the confiscation of your immortal soul by the IRS.
(I'm also having some housing issues, Don't feel like explaining them here, but they are worrying.)
I wish these forms were easier to figure out.
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I wish I could drive...
The Corrupted Wish Game - Jeunemaitre - 06-13-2005
Minionman,Jun 13 2005, 09:00 AM Wrote:I wish these forms were easier to figure out.
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[Prior to granting your wish, I can understand your frustration. My wife recently finished her application to sit for the Virginia Bar. Even after passing the Maryland Bar, the application took her several days, and several hours just trying to figure out what was being asked. Sorry but I'll inflict it on you...]
I've got good news for you. The forms are easier to figure out, but you now realize how much informatin is required. You now need to compile the following: your driving record (including documentation of the disposition of that speeding ticket you got 6 years ago), in addition to your credit report, contacts from every job you've had for the last 10 years (or 10 jobs, whichever is less), two identical passport-style photos, proof of good standing for all professional/student groups you currently belong to, school records back to high school (including certified transcripts indicating graduation). Also, pay special attention to the essay question about the importance of the ethics rule of your choice. Lastly, make sure you submit the forms in triplicate (each originally notarized). If you have any questions, they should all be answered by the instructions clearly printed at the top of each form. The bad news is, make sure your computer has a floppy drive and a CD drive, because both media need to be accessible simultaneously when installing the form template on your computer. Good luck...
I wish my wife and I had a shot at qualifying for a home loan that would get us in the market.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 06-13-2005
Granted. Not only do you get your home loan, you find an absolutely wonderful house close to work, schools, and retail centers without being obnoxiously so. All it needs is a little work...new carpeting, new wallpaper, new roof, new driveway... Before you know it, you're @$$ over eyesockets in credit card debt. And as soon as you finally get it all fixed up, the bottom drops out of the housing market. If you'd just waited a little longer, you could have gotten this house for about half what you paid. And you still owe some thirty grand and are staring bankruptcy in its ugly face.
See my previous wish.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Jeunemaitre - 06-13-2005
Lady Vashj,Jun 13 2005, 10:42 AM Wrote:See my previous wish.
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[Sorry to be out of order on the wish granting. By the way, we're already 50K in the hole on student loans, and the cheapest thing we've seen that's a respectable size is a 2.5 finished level townhouse, 2BR, 2.5 bath, 1 parking space, view of trees, but no walk-out, 410K, no really: 410K. Condo? most in the area we're looking are 350K+ for 2BR 1BA. God I hate the DC area housing market]
So you wish you could drive, huh? What can we do with that? :whistling:
Fortune smiles on you. After hours of practice and a substantial investment for a means of transportation, you have been granted what is to most people the most freeing priveledge that life has to offer: the ability to drive... cattle! That's right! you can now join in one of the most enjoyable [read: dusty] experiences that life has to offer. You've been hired by a cattle company with herds in west Texas (please don't kill me Occhi, I have no idea where there may be cattle country in Texas). You'll serve as a hand on the ranch and assist as the herd is rounded up and driven from one pasture to another across the land, as well as into processing pens. Dealing with these animals will be a big change from the peaceful life in Michigan, but you find it very rewarding [read: arduous]. What's not to like: working out of doors in a dynamic environment with interesting people, and all the beef you can eat at certain times of the year. You are to be envied Lady Vashj, you are truly to be envied.
Edit 3: Yeah, I forgot to make a wish, and just realized it too late to avoid punishment. Fine, I'll take the song. I think the title is something about an alpaca and a goose ;)
(thanks to the "thread that will rot your brain")
The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 06-13-2005
You failed to make a wish, young master. As punishment, you are hereby sentenced to spend the rest of your life with the same song stuck in your head, and no way to learn or remember what the name of that song is.
I wish my next class wasn't so far away.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-13-2005
Jeunemaitre,Jun 13 2005, 09:35 AM Wrote:[Prior to granting your wish, I can understand your frustration. My wife recently finished her application to sit for the Virginia Bar. Even after passing the Maryland Bar, the application took her several days, and several hours just trying to figure out what was being asked. Sorry but I'll inflict it on you...]
I've got good news for you. The forms are easier to figure out, but you now realize how much informatin is required. You now need to compile the following: your driving record (including documentation of the disposition of that speeding ticket you got 6 years ago), in addition to your credit report, contacts from every job you've had for the last 10 years (or 10 jobs, whichever is less), two identical passport-style photos, proof of good standing for all professional/student groups you currently belong to, school records back to high school (including certified transcripts indicating graduation). Also, pay special attention to the essay question about the importance of the ethics rule of your choice. Lastly, make sure you submit the forms in triplicate (each originally notarized). If you have any questions, they should all be answered by the instructions clearly printed at the top of each form. The bad news is, make sure your computer has a floppy drive and a CD drive, because both media need to be accessible simultaneously when installing the form template on your computer. Good luck...
I wish my wife and I had a shot at qualifying for a home loan that would get us in the market.
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Some of those conditions are actually pretty easy. I've only been driving 3 years, no speeding tickets, only 1 accident, not other tickets. I just graduated hihgh school, so the forms are all there, and I haven't been in that many student groups, so not trouble.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-13-2005
Lady Vashj,Jun 13 2005, 10:05 AM Wrote:You failed to make a wish, young master. As punishment, you are hereby sentenced to spend the rest of your life with the same song stuck in your head, and no way to learn or remember what the name of that song is.
I wish my next class wasn't so far away.
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granted. It's in the same building, just on the other side of the wall, but because of poor building design you have to go up 8 flights and down 8 flights of stairs to reach it.
I wish I could write better.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Lady Vashj - 06-14-2005
Minionman,Jun 13 2005, 07:41 PM Wrote:granted. It's in the same building, just on the other side of the wall, but because of poor building design you have to go up 8 flights and down 8 flights of stairs to reach it.Granted. You can write so well that you decide to write for a living. Too late do you realize what a meager living it is. Stephen King you ain't, son; you're probably gonna starve to death unless you go back to school.
I wish I could write better.
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I wish I knew exactly which files contain the saved-game data.
The Corrupted Wish Game - Minionman - 06-14-2005
Lady Vashj,Jun 14 2005, 06:59 AM Wrote:Granted. You can write so well that you decide to write for a living. Too late do you realize what a meager living it is. Stephen King you ain't, son; you're probably gonna starve to death unless you go back to school.
I wish I knew exactly which files contain the saved-game data.
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granted. 1st drawer down, 3rd folder back, in your blakc file cabinet next to the desk in room 23.
I wish song was spelled sring.
The Corrupted Wish Game - NiteFox - 06-14-2005
Minionman,Jun 14 2005, 06:40 PM Wrote:granted. 1st drawer down, 3rd folder back, in your blakc file cabinet next to the desk in room 23.Granted, but it forces a change to the fundamental laws of language, and it will take you a lring time to get used to things.
I wish song was spelled sring.
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I wish this thread was stickied so we wouldn't have to bump it all the time.
The Corrupted Wish Game - TaiDaishar - 06-14-2005
NiteFox,Jun 14 2005, 09:41 PM Wrote:Granted, but it forces a change to the fundamental laws of language, and it will take you a lring time to get used to things.
I wish this thread was stickied so we wouldn't have to bump it all the time.
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Granted. The entire thread is now covered with extremely sticky goo that catches anyone who has passed by it and consumes them slowly and painfully while all the time singing Barney songs to the horror of it's victims.
I wish the physics final would be over already!
The Corrupted Wish Game - Gurnsey - 06-14-2005
TaiDaishar,Jun 14 2005, 12:13 PM Wrote:Granted. The entire thread is now covered with extremely sticky goo that catches anyone who has passed by it and consumes them slowly and painfully while all the time singing Barney songs to the horror of it's victims.
I wish the physics final would be over already!
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It's over. You failed miserably to answer the only question, "Please use Quantum Chromodynamics to explain Pink Lawn-Flamingos, bagels and lox, and the Jerry Springer Show. Be sure to show your work."
I wish I would win the Lottery, even though I never play.