05-17-2003, 03:52 PM
I do understand that many children do all this because the parents set it up but from my small town perspective and experience, most of the kids I grew up with (myself included) who did a million and one things didn't do it because their parents asked them/forced them to, but because the child wanted to. Yes, some of the activities of the active children were things the parents made them try, but not always.
I don't know if children in larger cities are like this. But I know that my friends and I joined activities because we wanted to, often times so we could hang out with each other more. I was in a million things, my parents didn't ferry me to most of them either. I rode my bike or walked, as did my friends. This is part of what leads me to believe it is a smaller town thing, you don't want a 10 year old riding his bike by himself in New York or St. Louis. But in Platteville or Rolla, it isn't a big deal. Especially if Tim and John and Scott and Lisa are all riding with him too. Or older Brother Chad or Steve is with them as well.
Now admittedly I was doing so many things at times just to try and get the attention of my parents (though it didn't usually work) but many of my friends who had better households to grow up in, weren't in that boat. Their parents would make most of the major events when they could, and supported them, but the kid choose to do it, and could quit (and sometimes did) whenever they felt like it.
I see this in the children (I have none myself at age 28) of my friends now, many of whom have 3-10 year olds. The kids are asking the parents to be able to join this team or club or activity. Sure it may be from pressures because Johny or Susy is doing it and their parents forced them, but that isn't what I usually see.
I'm not convinced it really is a problem if the child really does want to do all these things. From middle school to high school I swam, played baseball, football, track, played 3 instruments, was on the yearbook, the newspaper, several academic teams, involved in school plays, Cub Scouts (bot not Boy Scouts), chess club. Not always in the same year, but in HS it was 3 sports, band, orchestra, yearbook, newspaper, academic teams. I still had free time, still just went and hung out, and everthing was voluntary at that stage. Swimming was the only thing that my parents made me do, I started swimming competitively at age 5, by age 7, I couldn't wait for the summer seaon to start, and since I made state my senior year, I was glad I did it. But everything else I joined of my own volition. Yeah, this whole paragraph was anecdotal, but I see the same type of patterns in other little kids I know. But again, I am little to kids in towns of 15,000 people or less with small universities in them.
I don't know if children in larger cities are like this. But I know that my friends and I joined activities because we wanted to, often times so we could hang out with each other more. I was in a million things, my parents didn't ferry me to most of them either. I rode my bike or walked, as did my friends. This is part of what leads me to believe it is a smaller town thing, you don't want a 10 year old riding his bike by himself in New York or St. Louis. But in Platteville or Rolla, it isn't a big deal. Especially if Tim and John and Scott and Lisa are all riding with him too. Or older Brother Chad or Steve is with them as well.
Now admittedly I was doing so many things at times just to try and get the attention of my parents (though it didn't usually work) but many of my friends who had better households to grow up in, weren't in that boat. Their parents would make most of the major events when they could, and supported them, but the kid choose to do it, and could quit (and sometimes did) whenever they felt like it.
I see this in the children (I have none myself at age 28) of my friends now, many of whom have 3-10 year olds. The kids are asking the parents to be able to join this team or club or activity. Sure it may be from pressures because Johny or Susy is doing it and their parents forced them, but that isn't what I usually see.
I'm not convinced it really is a problem if the child really does want to do all these things. From middle school to high school I swam, played baseball, football, track, played 3 instruments, was on the yearbook, the newspaper, several academic teams, involved in school plays, Cub Scouts (bot not Boy Scouts), chess club. Not always in the same year, but in HS it was 3 sports, band, orchestra, yearbook, newspaper, academic teams. I still had free time, still just went and hung out, and everthing was voluntary at that stage. Swimming was the only thing that my parents made me do, I started swimming competitively at age 5, by age 7, I couldn't wait for the summer seaon to start, and since I made state my senior year, I was glad I did it. But everything else I joined of my own volition. Yeah, this whole paragraph was anecdotal, but I see the same type of patterns in other little kids I know. But again, I am little to kids in towns of 15,000 people or less with small universities in them.
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It's all just zeroes and ones and duct tape in the end.
It's all just zeroes and ones and duct tape in the end.