What Would You Do to Save Someone's Life?
#1
As I was writing the title, and although it was not an inspiration for this post, but I suddenly thought of the film John Q 2002, which I have not actually seen but am familiar with the story.

Not that I am some sort of saint, and by the way, it seems like there already are plenty of them yet not enough, I have spent quite some time acting (poor choice of words) like a wandering Jesus helping people. I do not actually go out of my way to do it, as I already have too much to do (not complaining, just saying, and better I think to be busy than not), but for whatever reason, it seems situations are always presenting themselves in my path that could use my help, and I am always happy to help as long as I am able to.

Sometimes it is doing favors for people, picking them up at the airport (ok, so that is out of the way, and here I should rephrase, I do go out of my way often, but I maybe do not usually go looking for these situations, as they are always coming my way, for better or worse, and here I should rephrase again, as sometimes I guess I do go looking for these situations, as I have volunteered before), fixing their lawnmower, or giving them some money. Speaking of the last part, when I worked for the government, and I was situated in an area that would might call the ghetto, and I just called it home, I recall my neighbor, who said he was a former drug dealer pimp or whatever, he always borrowed money from me, but always paid me back. And the people from work who borrowed money from me, these being government employees, never paid me back. And outside of this situation, too many times my so-called friends never paid me back either.

Sorry to sidetrack with backstory, but now as for this post, about 2 years ago, my friend got diagnosed with cancer and had surgery to remove it, which only ended up making it worse unfortunately. And then she went thru kimo and radiation up until this point, and is still very sick, if not worse. As she was unable to work and is more or less alone here, as she is from another country, I took over paying all her bills, as a few years ago I moved back in with my father, who will be 81 this December, when he got diagnosed with cancer. He is doing ok though, he is a tough guy and they sure don't make them tough like that anymore (probably not true, just saying Tongue ). Anyway, not that I am rich, but I work all the time being the jack-ass-of-all-trades that I am, and living with my father the bills are lower, so I was glad I was able to help her. But like I said, it has been about 2 years of paying for her, and not blaming her of course, it is just a bad situation, and recently her doctor prescribed her medical marijuana, but her insurance does not pay for it. So I have been trying to jump thru hoops to pay for it, as it seems to be helping her, but the goverment (we are in New Jersey) sells it for a lot more than let us say they do at other places.

So why am I even posting this? Well, Diablo and the Lounge have been a good part of my life for quite some time, gosh, Diablo since 1996 and the Lounge soon after, and hey, Diablo be will 20 soon already, wow (no not world of warcraft). Although I think about Diablo often, I have not played in quite some time, as I got so much to do and I know if I start playing, nothing else would get done. Although very tempted, I have yet to even play Diablo 3, although I did watch some Russians playing it one day (in Russia, not China).

But I guess I wanted to rant a bit (you know, better out than in, like that scene from Dumb and Dumber 1994 with the gasman and the hot peppers), but being someone who, never being rich but working all the time, donates to charities and is always helping others, I was curious if anyone would donate to us via our website with paypal.

degrak.com

Degrak in some ways is a bit of a joke and a charity (that's no joke), but it is the name I officially use to work unofficially, and any money we do make goes to others, including animals and nature.

I do not expect anyone to donate, but it would be helpful if so, because of course like the bible, we get to believe what we want. Maybe what would help even more than donations, is some good wishes, prayers or whatever you are into, personally I am open and into anything positive, and I feel positive energy is very powerful especially in negative situations. Or if anyone knows any other charities we can apply to for help, as it is getting more and more difficult financially, mentally, physically etc ...

Again, I am not expecting anything, but any good surprises or bonuses are of course welcome.

I do not get to come here often as I am usually very occupied and absent-minded (easily distracted), but I hope all is ok for the rest of you, and as it is the holiday season, for those that partake in it, I hope that it is a good one for us all Smile (Ooo case in point, it says I last visited 11-04-2013)

If it was not for the email subscription, assuming anyone replies (or donates), my mind is so bad (busy) that I would probably forget I posted this. Just always have too much going on up top.
-degrak
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#2
Hi Scrape!

Nice to see you back here.

And thanks for posting the missive above. There was some drama in my family/friends group this weekend that made me really think about the question you posed in the title. And I still don't know the answer. I am vacillating between thinking I should try to help (again) and thinking that for some people, the help has to start within themselves. And that all that happens when you try to help some folks is that they pull you into the maelstrom with them, instead of you actually helping them.

It is easy for me to give to charities. My income is not large, but I have enough that I can. So I do. I am willing to pay for my principles. So I do pay more for some things because I believe in putting my money where my mouth is. And I spend a lot of time on community groups because somebody has to do it.

But it is a whole other kettle of fish when it comes to my family. A young man who used to be my eldest son's best friend reached out for help last weekend in a classically mentally ill passive-agressive way. Shades of the three-year-old's "I'll hold my breath and pass out if you don't let me do what I want". This person spent a lot of time in my home before his betrayals of trust made my son let him go.

So he is clearly ill. (Bipolar disorder, and with prescribed drugs for it, if he elects to take the drugs.)

And is it worth trying again to help him? And what does that do to/for my son, who doesn't need that loss again? Or my other sons, who also were part of the ongoing dramas and witnessed the betrayals?

I still don't know. Therefore, so far, the result is that I am doing nothing. But I thank you for helping me frame the internal debate.
And you may call it righteousness
When civility survives,
But I've had dinner with the Devil and
I know nice from right.

From Dinner with the Devil, by Big Rude Jake


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#3
Oh Shadow you beautiful obsidian battle axe you, and not to turn this into messenger-style chat, but it's always nice to see you Smile

I miss the good old times at HM. And I think we last talked on ICQ, which I have not turned on in quite some time. Need to dust that off one of these days.

I share the sentiment on charities. It's like when you go into a cafe (Starbucks etc) and give a tip. I cannot recall how many times people on the streets or whatever asked me for money and I gave. Sometimes I chat with them and ask them why. If they say they need money for food, I offer to buy them food. Most of the time they say no thanks and walk away. I remember one time in Miami downtown somewhere, this happened, and we went into the store and I bought this guy all types of goods, and when he asked me what I was doing in Miami, as I am clearly not from there, I said that I am sort of a wandering Jesus (hey, didn't I say this already?) and that I was put here to help you. He then said, "God bless, and can you also buy me a Coke?"

I have this habit that, when I am walking around, as I travel a lot, I pick up the garbage. Sometimes I almost feel like I am doing something wrong, cleaning up other peoples' mess, and that I force myself to do it. I probably have picked up more garbage in some places than most people in their lifetimes, and I only spent a few moments there.

Your talk of betrayal reminds me of this movie from 1997, The Spanish Prisoner, because it is nothing about betrayal and deception and taking advantage of a nice guy who works hard.

Well, sorry you are having trouble, but tis life no, to deal with problems? I guess a good way to look at it, is that in life there are always problems, it is all a matter of how we deal with them. If I can be of any assistance, I am always here for you, of course, more as a thought, that is Big Grin
-degrak
Using more than one question mark does not make it anymore of a question.
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